I embark on a solo trip to Hawaii with trepidation. What am I thinking going all by myself? How will I manage? Who will I hike with? talk to? eat with? The answer (spoiler alert) turned out to be me. The first step is the airplane. I pack a backpack with a few essentials for the week, board the plane and am pleased to have an aisle seat. Another solo female traveler sits in the aisle seat at the end of our row with two seats separating us. We make eye contact and telegraph our hope that no one will sit between us. Our wish is granted and, while we never speak over the 10 hour flight, she is a perfect travel companion.
The Maui fires are foremost on the news and it’s having an impact on the rental car wait when I arrive at HNL. We are assured that there are cars for everyone but there will be a long wait. I am on line for three hours. The woman on line in front of me misses her friend’s bridal shower and rehearsal dinner as she waits. We chat and I find out that she’s just in for the weekend wedding from Seattle. I wait with more patience that usual and it dawns on me, as I see other complainy travelers (some yelling and cursing at the rental staff), that since I have no one to take care of or worry about I am allowed to react with calm and have no anxiety about the wait.
I strategize about how to best enjoy my week and decide to take a three prong approach. Every day I will hike/walk, eat something delicious and have a cultural experience. Every morning I wake up early for sunrise hikes. Makapuu point, circle walk around Diamond Head, Hanama Bay, Lanakai Pillbox, Waikiki beach … each more picturesque than the next. I agonize about hiking Kokohead but ultimately decide that I don’t want to do that alone but I’m still not sure it was the right decision.
Delicious food everyday is easy, too easy. I eat a daily spam musubi, from 7-11 or the ABC store, on my morning hikes but opt for more exotic fare later in the day. I find a Vietnamese restaurant near Walmart (for all my shopping essentials like ramen for my hotel room). I sit alone at a small table and the awkwardness dissipates quickly as I take the time to enjoy the meal and people watch. I order the house bahnmi with its crispy French bread and fresh herbs and a child size portion of ramen, which is so big I can’t finish it. After some sweaty hikes I head to Waioloa Shave Ice and indulge in their consistent deliciousness of fluffy ice, ice cream, lillikoi, Azuki beans, boba, and condensed milk. One morning before driving the Pali Highway I go to the famous Leonards for malasadas. I get there before it opens and chat with a woman from Tennessee as we wait on a short line. I order one of every flavor. I pull over on the highway for sunrise and I take a huge bite of all six in turn to get the full effect of the fillings – haupia is my favorite no it’s the jelly or maybe the chocolate pudding. I break up the half eaten donuts and feed it to the chickens who are also enjoying the sunrise. I eat ahi or salmon poke almost every day. A woman on the deli line at Foodland gives me some good flavor recommendations for a poke bowl. One morning I drive to the north shore stopping off wherever looks pretty and end up at Giovanni’s Shrimp Truck. There is no line and the shrimp and rice is savory and garlicy. Most of my vacation meals are so good but there are some missteps. One afternoon I walk around chinatown and get a mediocre curry pork bun and then get overcharged for some meh beef and rice dish. I try to talk to a little girl sitting in the restaurant but all she can say is, “I come from China.” Most of the restaurants I patronize are small family run places which have a good vibe. One morning on a walk around Diamond Head a woman standing in her front yard gives me a mango that just fell from her tree. The mango is one of the best that I’ve ever had, super juicy and sweet, maybe because it was mixed with kindness from a stranger and a beautiful walk.
My cultural experiences were varied. Who knew Hawaii had a Museum of Modern Art? The dried flower waterfall exhibit was amazing and my favorite piece of art there is The Lei Maker. I walked through all the galleries twice enjoying the eye fest; with no teenage daughter complaining, “mom, dad and I agree that when we go to museums you spend too much time looking” (sadly, true story). Hawaiian Plantation Village focused on the life of immigrant planters of all races – Chinese, Japanese, Portuguese, Filipino, Puerto Rican? there are Puerto Rican immigrants in Hawaii?? I toured their homes and places of worship. The smell, plants and structures reminded me of Trinidad. Iolani Palace is subdued and lovely while the Temple of the Gods is so very grand with the enormous green lava flow mountains and the Buddhist Temple. I loved walking up and ringing the immense gong to announce my arrival. The capital building had a respectable amount of beautiful Hawaiian art. Local theater featured a play written by a High School teacher revolving around Hawaiian volcanic legend and its impact on a native family. I don’t want to be a theater critic but I was glad the ticket was very reasonably priced.
Traveling alone is ironically a community affair. I noticed that I talked to more strangers that I normally would because being alone makes you more approachable. I also seemed to gravitate towards other women or perhaps they gravitate to me. From the woman who gave me a mango to the woman at the supermarket to the woman at Leonards or the kind woman at the second Lanakai Pillbox who offered to take my picture because she noticed that I was alone, we women see each other and organically support each other and that is a great comfort.
unbecomingjane 